Last night as I was taking Campy out for a walk the woman in the camping spot next to us said, “You guys are ALWAYS on the go!” She almost looked exhausted just thinking about it. Which made me think about what she sees (and hears) on most days.
- One of us walking Lars and Campy at least 10 times a day
- One or all of us leaving for road bike rides
- One or all of us heading to the beach with surfboards and beach gear
- Me working and on the phone for hours at a time
- Randy managing to work on school with Kalden, entertain Lars, work on Axel Project
Yes that is a lot.
I get asked all the time how we “balance it all” and the truth is that there’s very little balance if you think of it as equal balance on a schedule; we live more fluid than that. Balance for us is a combination of achievement and enjoyment.
There is a new movement in the tech industry to hire Moms on their own terms (working remotely, increased flexibility etc…). I have not read the Lean In book but from what I hear and see with that philosophy the focus is on achievement and very little emphasis on enjoyment. We don’t need more women (or men) that focus only on achievement and hold off enjoyment until some far away time in their lives.
Enjoyment is going for a 20 mile bike ride with my son in the middle of the day, achievement is then working at night to catch up on work. Or taking a family day in the middle of the week and making work up the next day or on the weekend.
Achievement and enjoyment fuel us everyday. We want to achieve something but we also want to enjoy life on all levels (personal, family, work). Sure some days are all work and no play and some days are mostly play but the balance for us lies when we consistently have both in our lives.
And yes, a life of achievement and enjoyment looks like a lot of effort from the outside.